Standing In The Fire...

My season is changing if I like it or not. This weekend I moved my youngest son into his dorm in New York City. I love this city and have lived in it for a summer but when it comes to leaving my youngest here it seems so much more daunting. But what is much more daunting is my new season of life. I have been a full time mom, plus may hours, for 25 years. As my older two sons are living independent lives I now move into the season of full time wife. What do I do now?

While reading the story of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego one thing that strikes me is when the three were in the fire, they were not alone. Fire that destroyed the men who took them to the furnace and burned off the bindings that the three were tied by the strongest soldiers of the army. Even in the heat of the moment they were there with Jesus being protected.

This season feels like a fire burning around me. The heat of not knowing what my life looks like in the near future. The heat of not knowing what is next in my marriage. The heat of loneliness that burns my heart. Fear engulfs me like the smoke rising. I am fearful of being old. I am fearful of what lies ahead. I am fearful that nothing lies ahead for me. I have done the hardest job on earth and that is all I am to do. I am fearful that time with my husband will reveal that he does not want to be with me. The fear suffocates me when I allow it. I have stuffed down the fear before trying to hide it, overcome it, extinguish it. I learned from that mistake. Pushing it down does nothing but intensify the flame and smoke. I stand in the fire as Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego did. I stand and allow Him to refine me in the season I am in.

I know that Jesus is with me. Protecting, Supporting. Guiding. When my circumstances burn around me I am not alone. I am choosing to stand in the fire and allow Him to protect me, support me and guide me to all that there is to be in this season.

Are you in the midst of circumstances that feel as if you are in a fiery furnace? Are you standing in the fire knowing that God is with you; protecting supporting and guiding? What season are you finding yourself in that you need to stand in the fire to find your way with God?

Now I wait...

Oh how easy to encourage others when they meet anxious times and circumstances in their life. "God will lead you, lean on him." "He is in control." "Stand in His Will." While attending the She Speaks Writers and Speakers Conference a month ago one of the things I most enjoyed was being with like-minded writers and speakers through the anxiousness of presenting our book's one page.

One by one we would enter a room to exit trying to be strong after a quick response of "Build your platform." "Read these three books." "Speaking may be a better route for you."  "Narrow your focus." "I'll be in touch." And many more. A few ladies were asked for their proposals and a few were offered self publishing guidance. In one of the sessions Lysa Terkeurst gave great direction on narrowing your focus and began to pray about my focus.

Having gone in with high expectations many left feeling deflated. However, we all kept our heads up and professed His Will not mine. But truly on the inside some of us bled a little. I know I did. I was hoping to find focus and a plan for the impending empty nest. I am not saying that it was a bad experience, just the opposite, it was humbling and rewarding. I prayed and sought guidance from God, as I had before but with more intensity. I prayed that His path would be clear, not my desires. I prayed for focus.

When I returned home I took time off from writing. (Do writers ever take time off?) It isn't so easy to encourage me when I am alone and deep into my own thoughts. I took time off to pray and yes write, not on my book but ideas. God kept nudging me, shoving me in a very focused direction. During the past few weeks God pressed on my heart something He has nudged me with before. He wants me to write about marriage, something I speak about often and have even taught a marriage course with my husband. I decided to get out of God's way and tackle the topic of marriage. Ideas flowed. I bought domain names. I began to build a blog.

I told my prayer warriors who had valiantly prayed for me before the conference that I had put my book on a shelf and would be pursuing my new blog. I had left my hope of publishing that non-fiction in the lobby of the hotel after the conference. I needed to narrow my focus. I knew I was on the right track in what God had called me to write because less than 24 hours after starting the blog it was hacked! The enemy struck in the form of an internet hacker.

After a week of waiting to regain control of my blog I was at peace with the circumstances. It was a time to organize my thoughts and ideas, put a plan together for the outline of the blog and begin writing entries. Then there was an email. When I saw the email I couldn't remember where I had seen the sender's name before. I thought for a moment before opening. The lightbulb in my memory surged into full blown electricity. She is the publisher that said I will be in touch. And now here she was. "I would like to present your proposal to my team." WHAT?!?!?!?! Something like this in the peace of the chaotic moment?

I pondered the changes I should make on the proposal. I prayed. I got two endorsements from authors. I prayed. I wrote the email. I prayed. I attached the proposal. I prayed. I prayed for His Will to be done. I prayed for His purpose to be glorified. I prayed. Then I hit send. My body was shaking, I wanted to vomit!!! And then I prayed for God's hands to be in the mix not mine. I prayed for His abilities to handle this not mine. I found peace. Peace that no matter what anxieties or circumstances, He is with me and His plan will prevail even if I cannot see what lies ahead.

Now I wait. I wait for the next step. I continue to move forward in the calling God has placed on me to write about marriage. But I wait for His guidance in all things. And sit in His peace.

10 Things I learned from my first Writer’s Conference…

10 Things I learned from my first Writer’s Conference…

1.     Surround yourself. Being surrounded by others that are likeminded and focused is extremely inspiring!

2.     Business Cards. Bring Business Cards WITH your photo on them! This makes it easy to put a face with a name!

3.     Separate Sections. Place your business cards in a completely separate section than the cards you are collecting. I was handed the wrong card by at least five women. I am glad I read this tip before attending the conference!

4.     Card note. Write a note on each business card you are given so you have a reminder where and when you met the person. I kept up with this on the first two days. The third day was way too overwhelming! I gathered over 100 cards on the first two days and almost as many on the third.

5.     Bring a notebook. I brought a one-subject notebook to take notes. The conference gave you a book with outlines of each talk but having extra space to write was invaluable. Organize the notebook by making a list of the sessions and talks you take notes on. I used the last page of the notebook to create the list. These made it much easier to refer back to what order your notes are in when you want to refer back.

6.     Extra Pens. Bring more than a couple of pens. I ran out of ink in two pens and half of another. So much great information.

7.     Star and Highlight nuggets. When taking notes put a star or highlight those sticky statements or important nuggets of wisdom. This allows you to see where the impact of the session occurred for you.

8.     Build lasting relationships. Make contact with the writers that you felt a connection with. They can be a great resource during and after the conference!

9.     Be humble and encouraging. Promoting yourself to other writers doesn’t always encourage them to spend time with you. Invest time in others and what they are writing; it creates a mutual interest and encouragement.

10. Rest and reenergize. After the conference set your notes aside for a few days to a week. When you revisit them you are able to see them with a fresh eye.

The first writer’s conference was a huge success for me. Not because I got a book deal, but I grew as a writer. I am taking these nuggets of knowledge and continuing to grow. I am blessed to have met so many women who are like-minded and encouraging. If you haven’t been to a conference begin to look for one that meets your need to grow as a writer not just one that has the most availability to publishers or agents. Being around these writers has begun a fire for my future as a writer and my desire to pursue what God has in store for me.

Do you have a suggestion for a different writer’s conference that has been an amazing experience for you?