Stumbling through the Seasons and Finding me....

As I stumble through the season of endings, that of being a mother of children at home, I am beginning to piece together the constants in my life and focusing on their significance as I begin to find footing in the next season of beginnings.

1. Baseball:  The one absolute constant in my life is baseball.  Not only because my husband in a coach, but that I have loved the game for the majority of my life.  I began listening to the radio as the Yankees play, to watching friends play in middle school, high school and college.  I met my husband who was and is a baseball coach.  All three of my boys have played with extreme passion.  So many times in this crazy baseball life I have focused on the multiple moves, long days spent apart, and the loneliness that can overwhelm you at times.  Seeing baseball as my constant shows me that it has been such a blessing.  We may not know where we are going to be year to year but I do know that when I am there we are blessed with great family and friends through baseball.
2. Love of giving:  I have always been a giver; of time and of finances.  Now with out the focus of meeting the immediate needs of my kids I am finding that I have so much more to give.  I am starting to see more opportunities to volunteer.  If you are responsible to your time you can find so many opportunities to spend a few minutes helping someone or organization.  I am also finding more opportunities to give financially.  In the past I would say, "I don't have the finances to give."  Until I opened my eyes and gave FIRST I really didn't see the blessings that come from it.  It is out of obedience to God that we give, He gave it to us so out of obedience we give back from the fruits that He gives.  When the hubby and I began to tithe we saw our finances being blessed, out of our obedience to God we became more obedient in our spending.
3. Building relationships:  I have always loved getting know people.  Just ask any of my kids or my husband, I can talk!  But I don't just talk to talk, I talk to allow another person to know that they matter.  Some of the people I will never see again, but in that moment they know they matter.  When my kids were young and I was extremely frustrated with being alone with them for extended periods of time and wanted to run, I read something that changed the way I responded to them.  It said to light up when your child walks in the room like it is the first time you have seen them in a long time.  Light up when you see people, give them a moment of love and acceptance.  You won't only bless them but you will be blessed.
4. Dreams and Desires:  I am finding that they are now are mine.  For so many years I have been so focused on the dreams and desires of my kids and my husband that those were my dreams and desires also.  I am not stating this because I feel as if I gave mine up but that those were MINE, fulfilling the dreams and desires as best I could for my family.  Not that I am no longer a supporter and encourager of their dreams and desires but my boys have become independent men, they are the drivers of their dreams and desires.  Now it is time for MINE!!!!!
5. Writing:  I have always loved writing but had never been encouraged through my childhood.  I often wrote prayers and hid them away in books.  I also wrote a Christmas children's book that I even illustrated.  While at a Professional Baseball Christian Conference there was an ask for women who would like to write devotionals for the Baseball Chapel website to please contact the woman who oversaw the devotions.  I struggled for a while if I was good enough to write, but the Lord overtook those fears and I have been writing them for over 8 years now!  This year I have become even more focused on writing as I feel God has pushed me in that direction.  With this blog and a writing class I am taking with a friend I feel the skill of writing is developing!  I am going to enjoy writing and whatever the Lord brings to me.

As I continue my journey through the seasons of endings and beginnings I have one major goal....To see the blessings the Lord has given me and is continuing to give to me while praising Him through it all!!!!